Pray for Britney

I really do feel sorry for Britney Spears. It's very obvious that no one parented her well when she was a child. Then she became a superstar and was allowed to do whatever she wanted. She has no concept of reality now....and it's coming back to hurt her severely.

This quit being funny a while ago. It's just tragic now. A young woman's life is on the line, and it is time for her mother to step in.

If Britney's mother truly loves her, she would get her into some kind of program. It might hurt, it might be difficult, but Lynne should go to court and fight to get legal custody of Britney on the grounds that she cannot make rational decisions right now. Get her into rehab, therapy, and whatever program she needs...and stay with her to see that it is done. Remove the people around her that are enabling her.

I realize this is asking for a lot. This is the woman who allowed her 16 year old daughter to live with her older boyfriend and get pregnant.

But with all her faults, Lynne may be the only person who can actually help her. To do that, Lynne needs to step up and be a mother. Not a friend, not a manager, not a parasite. A mother.

Let's hope she can do it. Not for money, not for acclaim, but in order to save her daughter's life.

But by all means...keep this freak away from her. All he'll try to do is exploit her for ratings and book sales.

Spears Family Antics

I think I smell a wacky new sitcom in the air!

Center it around Jamie Lynn Spears, the pregnant, 16-year old star of Nickelodeon's "Zoey 101" and her baby daddy, 18-year old Casey Aldridge, for the on-going hilarious hi-jinx of teenage parents living in both Hollywood and Louisiana with wealth and paparazzi around every corner.
Feature older sister, pop star Britney Spears, as the slightly ditzy next door neighbor. Add in her two children Sean Preston and Jayden James. Bring back the legendary Lassie as the boys' canine nanny who not only makes sure that the boys are buckled in their baby seats in the car, but also brings their mama panties to wear in public when she forgets to put them on.

Also include Britney's first husband (of 55 meaningful hours!) Jason Alexander and her second husband Kevin Federline for witty repartee and in-depth discussions of world events.

Every third show, bring in Federline's ex Shar Jackson (former star of "The Ex-Wives Club") and her children with Federline, Kori and Kaleb, to provide some comedic tension.

And at the end of each show, bring in mama Lynne Spears to provide a life lesson and parenting tip from her upcoming book Pop Culture Mom: A Real Story of Fame in a Tabloid World. No need for a laugh track, as the studio audience will be in stitches.

When you get to sweeps month, have "Seinfield" TV star Jason Alexander show up for some comic misunderstandings with the first former Mr. Spears while Britney's ex-lover Justin Timberlake stops by to lend a shoulder for her to cry a river on in a "very special episode."

I smell high ratings....or at least a great episode of "Jerry Springer."